A Texan asked a Cuban and a New Yorker out to dinner. The waitress said to them: “ Excuse me, but because of a shortage, we are out of meat.”
The Texan asked, “What’s a shortage?”
The Cuban asked, “What’s meat?”
The New Yorker asked: “What’s ‘excuse me?”
At a swanky hotel, a guy walks up to the front desk and asks the clerk, “Do I register with you?”
“Not by any stretch of imagination,” snaps the woman.
I am my own grandfather!
Well, Sam, I’ll tell you how it is. You see, I married a widow, and this widow had a daughter. Then my father being a widower, married our daughter, so, you see my father is my own son-in-law”
“Yes, I see”
“Then again my stepdaughter is my stepmother, ain’t she? Well, then her mother is my grandmother, ain’t? So that makes me my own grandfather, doesn’t it?